Friday, 9 October 2009

Tories wetting themselves

David Cameron had a big speech today where, as usual, he tried desperately to be his hero Tony Blair. For all that Cameron criticises Blair, he acts like him and appears tragically jealous of the genuine (if a bit weird) adoration Blair inspired.

Cameron made his big pitch on a personal basis rather than policies, which gives a fair indication that the Tories don't actually have any. It's fair to say that Labour have run out of steam and run out of ideas, but at least they had some in the first place.

There was a moment of shocked indignation where Cameron rightly pointed out that Labour have not helped the worst-off as much as they should, but wrongly claimed that it was "left to the Tories to help the nation's poor". Cue the entire Conservative Party wetting themselves like over-excited puppies with excitement that people might think they, the right-wing party of right-wing British politics, are on the side of the Average Ordinary Common Man In The Street. Yes Labour have alienated ordinary middle and working class people as well as the rich, but it's mostly on an emotional level about things like red tape and Political Correctness Gone Mad - things which are equally a result of the state, not just the government of the day.

The worst part was finding out that William Bloody Hague is likely to be our next Foreign Minister. WBH was the first leader of the Conservative Party after 1997 and took the party dramatically to the right, appealling to xenophobes and racists when they made Europe and immigration their top priorities. Foreign Ministers have to TALK to other countries about stuff! WBH doesn't even LIKE other countries!

The sad icing on the cake was hearing a clip of The Killers playing as Cameron got up on stage. Massive Attack made a public statement in 2000 after the Conservatives used their music without permission, saying "Massive Attack have not and will never support the Conservative party or their policies". I know the Conservatives are likely to win the next UK election, and that The Killers are not overtly political themselves and not British (they may not know the Tories' policies, or the policy-shaped hole where there should be some), but I like The Killers and I do not like the Conservatives. So this made me sad.

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