Wednesday, 8 September 2010

Sir 50 of Cent

Genius has landed - someone is tweeting 50cent's tweets in the Queen's English:

@English50cent My work continues. *laughs* Please refrain from pestering Soulja. He was conned by a female dog. Water barricades gladly received.
 But the best thing is when you look and read the original. Here's one of my favourites:
@50cent Busta still has the best show in hip-hop I'm not shiting on him. And I aint dissing serena either I said i gotta workout!yal be buggin
@English50cent I am sincere in praising Busta Rhymes' live abilities and Serena Williams' sexually intimidating strength. You resemble insects.
Unfortunately while looking I had the misfortune to look at 50cent's actual Twitter page, and nearly vomitted on my misanthropy when I saw his background. It consists of images of either wearing a suit or topless, playing baseball or basketball or boxing or simply looking meaningfully at the viewer, with the words CONFIDENT SMART RICH STRONG and I'M EVERYTHING YOU NEED GIRL. From anyone else it would be irony, but not Mister Cent. The fact the human race can produce such a massive cockface makes me want to kill absolutely everyone, including myself, to make sure no such motherfucker will ever grace the internet.

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